Thinking back on everything, I have no idea on how this whole thing started in the first place. I don’t have any idea how a girl like that would suddenly go crazy and try to kidnap me. Maybe it was running? Maybe it was me pulling her out and then the strange sense of relief caused something? Maybe it was the air? I don’t know, and I don’t think it could be explained to me anyways. From when I escaped from her, this question has been going through my mind more and more, and it makes less and less sense the more I think about it. It’s like, I find out more flaws for how everything has been going, and it just doesn’t make any sense. Maybe the entire thing is magic, and she has that to work with or something, but I don’t know. But that’s just my thoughts on it.
Recently I saw a family walking down the street. It was a mom, dad, and a kid…
They looked happy…
I miss my family…
I used to have dreams of having a family like that… but now? If I were to try to get that, I don’t know what will happen to me or the woman I was with, or if it was her, I don’t know how she would act.
I digress, what’s strange recently is that I haven’t been eating much. I used to never miss a meal, even while on the run, but now I’m barely eating anything. It was about a week after my last post that this started to happen, but I don’t think there’s any relation. I also probably look like hell, as my shopping trip has been postponed recently. I just feel really apathetic right now, as I’ve been running for so long…
I’m thinking about just giving up and giving in. I’m tired of running, and everywhere I go only can hide me for so long. It’s somehow this place that’s kept me hidden for about two weeks, which is the longest I’ve ever been without her coming close. Maybe she gave up? I can hope, but at the same time, I just don’t know the why, which is the scariest part of the entire thing.
Usually I am able to find some signal that she has come close, but recently I haven’t heard a peep. It’s kind of funny, as having no sign of her is almost more terrifying than having her one step behind me.
Well, that being said, I’m tired of living in abandoned buildings and in the forests. They always make it too easy to overheat or freeze in summer and winter respectively. I haven’t been able to shave for a long time, and it looks terrible on me. It’s really patchy and looks absolutely terrible, but it’s there to stay. I don’t have anywhere to get enough water to shave, let alone bathe, on a regular basis, and so I just leave it be and save the money for food.
I guess that I should answer a few more questions
QUESTION: Where have you lived?
Answer: The forest is a good place to hide from people if you know where to look for the hiding spots, and/or disguise your sleeping quarters. Abandoned buildings are also a good place to find. Just don’t be sleeping under a bridge, as that’s never a good idea. The wind keeps blowing constantly, and it makes life unbearable. I’m sure that there are much better spots to stay in, but that’s what I’ve found are the best for hiding.
QUESTION: What did you look like?
ANSWER: I looked like a good mix of Americans. Like, if you took the average American person, it would probably look like me. I’m extremely average. I used to have a bit of a gut, but considering that I’ve done nothing but work recently, I’m pretty much just skin and bone. Brown hair, brown eyes. The usual person you wouldn’t think twice about.
I just don’t know how much longer I can hold on for. I’m going to move again after posting this, and I don’t know if it’ll be the last. I just wish that I was able to understand why this happened to me of all people.
Till next time.